What did he say at the meeting? Only 300 more days to go this school year?!?!?

I'm a teacher for a group of middle school brats. I have always enjoyed my job up until this year. Everything they've ever wanted has been handed to them. They almost all have cell phones. most carry an MP3, PSP, Game Boy or some device to mindlessly try to get through the day. They believe they have the right to do whatever they wish and nothing will come of it. The suspensions here are a joke. we have a principal (female) and an asst. principal (male). Some examples of this month's issues:
1). Student comes into class extremely late. When asked for a pass, she cannot produce one. she stays in class but is written up and referred to the office. end result?? Nothing. I was never asked what occurred and he (asst. principal) could care less.
2). Tardiness to school is no big deal. We are asked to set up meetings with the offending parents. It does not help. They throw excuses like Roger Clemmens throws fastballs. "I can't help it...she always needs me to go back and get something." "We try to gt up, but we're not early people." "We get up at 6:15, but never get here on time (mind you we start at 7:15)."
3). A kid actually accused me of locking her inside the classroom. Even worse, I was questioned by the PRINCIPAL by it. Mind you, it is a FIRE HAZARD to have a double lock. All locks are for going into a room but allow the person to get out, so this is impossible. Nonetheless, I get questioned over it.
4). Parents who complain about their children because their child didn't do the work and want a free grade, redo, or late grade. I made it VERY clear that I don't accept late work. I tell them at least once per week, put it in my syllabus, and drill it into their heads daily. life doesn't have freebies, so why should school. these students are well into their teenage years. They need to understand that they have one shot at things.

Some things I apparently need to tell the parents at the beginning of the year:
a). Your child is here to work, not socialize. Save that for the hallways, lunch, and before/after school.
b). Do you have a job? Are you late to work? If not, then why is your child to school late? if you have a job and are consistently late, how do you still have a job?
c). If your child failed and got a 65%, it was a "gimmie" grade. Be happy he/she didn't get the 30/40/2 he/she deserved.
d). Don't complain to the teachers if your child's IPod/MP3 player, Game Boy, PSP, etc. is stolen while being locked away. Luckily I haven't had that issue, but other teachers have. If your child brought it and it was stolen, it's his/her fault, no one else's (except maybe yours for condoning it).
e). Do not get mad if a cell phone is taken up. if it was taken up, it's because the teacher saw it when it is to be concealed (definition: To keep from being seen, found, observed, or discovered; hide.) and off (definition: out of operation or effective existence).
f). Double-check your child's clothing to see what is being worn is indeed appropriate. If you are called to bring in other clothes, don't complain. You have a child, show responsibility.

Ok, that's better. I'm de-stressed, it took less than an hour, and it cost me nothing. MUCH better than a psych visit. :)